Introducing discipline in kids is a challenge faced by parents in every generation. Parents often ignore the behavior of kids thinking they are innocent & too young. By doing so you are just postponing your own task. Discipline is behavioral traits that as parent you need to teach your kid. Never equate discipline with punishment, if you do so you are going to worst the situation. No one likes being ordered to do something or punished for not doing it correctly, punishment can lead to power struggle, as the child brain is ready to fight back every time he is stopped from doing something.
Here are 4 things that you need to do as parents to get your child disciplined.
Its important to understand that kids demand start as early as 6 months or even earlier, if so why can’t we teach discipline as early as 6 months old kid. The earlier you start the better it is. It’s proven that till the age of 5 the kids mind can learn anything and everything, therefore it’s even more important to build the character and behavior in first new years.
New born cry when hungry, when diapers are wet & elders pick them up. Kids very well understand that their needs bring elders close to them and therefore they cry more & more for attention and slowly the need converts into demand. It important to engage kid with some toys or music to divert there attention every time they demand to pick them up, even when there is no specific need. By doing so kids might is diverted and slowly they stop crying for attention.
Keep the attention basket always full with positive attention, else they will seek out for negative ways for getting attention. We also tend to pay immediate attention on negative activities, kids very well understand that its easier to get attention with negative acts, because to them any attention is important then no attention at all.
This doesn’t mean that you have to be on your kid side 24×7. Its important to spend some distraction free time with your kid, engaging in activities of their choice and keep appreciating the performance in those activities. This will build immense sense of reward in their behavior. Take out whatever time possible 10 – 15 minutes every day to do things your child love doing, play game of his/her choice, or read books, or dance, or sing. Let the cell the phone ring, put it away in the closet. You will see remarkable difference in child’s behavior by filling the attention basket with positivity, your kid will be more cooperative and patient towards things and less likely to seek out attention in negative ways.
INVEST TIME IN TRAINING
As parents it’s important to understand that it’s only & only your job to train the kid for right attitude and behavior in life. The best way to discipline the child is to encourage them to decide to make better choices then wrong choices. In order to teach discipline you can do behavioral role-plays to show how as kids our response should be on various situations in life. Speak sentences using words & phrases such as, please, so kind of you, lets sharing, so nice of you etc. to emphasize of importance of being polite and ease of getting things done while being polite towards someone.
Switch roles and act like your child; give your child chance to direct you on how to act in given situation. Use calm voice and stay composed while training your child on discipline; it’s equally critical for parent to be disciplined while training the kid.
SET LIMITS & DELAY THINGS
Setting boundaries for kids is important component of teaching discipline. It’s proven that kids thrive and excel in life if they know their boundaries. This doesn’t mean you need to overboard your kid with rules and regulations but just focus on what is important for the kid. Rules should be common for entire family and what happens on breaking the rule should be applicable on all. If everyone has to wash hands before meal or put dishes for wash post meal, ensure all elders or kid does it. Kids see and learn they do as elders do therefore its important to keep a common book of rules for all.
Elders often facilitate students with what they demand immediately without considering the time or place where it is asked for. Delaying things help build patience in kids, which helps them later in life managing critical situations and tasks. Fulfilling kids demands immediately make them impatient, you might have seen kids in your surrounding blackmailing their parents to get things done. Its an unpleasant situation and as they grow old this becomes a major behavioral challenge. Consider delaying things in kids based on their age from few hours to days to months and you will see remarkable difference in your child’s personality.
Just remember never consider punishment as medium to teach discipline, never think its someone else job to teach your child discipline, never overdo things and maintain balance and show patience with kid while trying to get the disciplined.